Dec. 14th. National Monkey Day! The day where we all gather together with our families to celebrate all things monkey.
To celebrate I thought I would show everyone a few kinds of monkeys and impart to you, my friends some info about them.
No, this isn't our dearly departed Pat Morita. This is a Capuchin Monkey. Capuchin monkey's live in trees from the looks of this picture. They enjoy a diet of various fruits and the occasional Blow Pop.
Up next is this sad sack Colobus Monkey. They have a white face and jet black hair. Colobus monkeys are known for being unusually depressed for an animal. They spend most of their day sitting around listening to songs about how much life stinks and updating their blog/livejournal/myspace. Every colobus monkey likes to think they are unique and different from the other ones even though they all look and act the same.
This rainbow coalitioned faced monkey is known as the Mandrill. They are kind of like a Baboon on acid as far as I can tell. The male Mandrills not only have the colorful face that you see here, but also a total ROY G BIV penis that they proudly display during maing season and at sporting events. Be thankful you can't see the other end of this great beast.
This handsome son of a gun right here is the Proboscis Monkey. I still can figure why it's called that. Anyway, Proboscis monkeys are best known for being 10 pounds of ugly in a 5 pound bag. They have extremely nasal high pitched howls. Proboscis monkeys will try to tell you they have a "Roman nose" because it sounds better than dick face.
This jazzy bastard right here is commonly known as an Ass Monkey.Although granted with opposable thumbs, the ass monkey finds it difficult to operate doors (especially in China). Ass monkeys are also known for lying to push forward hidden agendas and catering to the Texas banana barons. Ass monkeys can be commonly found on vacation when they are most needed.
YEAH POLITICAL COMMENTARY ON MY BLOG! What now Sean Hannity? Its your move bitch!!
To learn more about Monkey Day, please visit here...
Happy Monkey Day!
9 comments:
Monday Monkey lives for the weekend.
hey dude
yer back!
Hey I saw a monkey at the zoo on Monday and went to take a picture, he then crapped in his hand and started to eat it slowly....looking at me.
I wasn't sure but I think he might of been hitting on me.
Happy Monkey Day you fart face!
Is it weird that those pictures aroused me?
Happy... Monkey Day??
I'm not crapping in my hand for no monkey day - well maybe I'll use a rubber glove.
You're a funny s.o.b.
Hey, I voted for that Ass Monkey. Twice!
McCain/Guiliani in 2008!
You never fail to make me laugh.
You honor me.
1. I'm really upset I was unaware of the observance of Monkey Day as I, naturally, think monkeys rock.
2. That's some funny shit!
3. Becky -The first time I EVER went to a zoo, the gorrillas just sat around crapping into their hands and eating it. Upon further questioning, I discovered zoo keepers force this practice to "cut down on food and maintenance costs."
Post a Comment