As I have mentioned before, I have been known to frequent a chat room or two out of boredom or whenever I feel the need for some level of social contact because real people scare me.
There is an extremely wide selection of chat rooms to go into these days such as "Back Chat" and "Toronto Women Pee On Me." Some days I will wander in and out of these rooms to see what they are like and also pretend to be a lesbian co-ed who just broke up with her Ukrainian model girlfriend and is in need of consoling as a result.
One time I was perusing the list of room names and I saw one I didn't understand.
"TV, CD, TS, TG"
Now, some of you may know what goes on in this room, but at the time I had no clue so I double clicked the name and headed on in.
I immediately started asking what went on in that room. No one would tell me. All they would say was, "Look at someone's profile , darlin." Being the totally self centered, oblivious jackass that I am, I was too caught up in asking everyone if they talked about Television and Albums in the room instead of looking at someone's picture.
After a ridiculous twenty minutes of demanding someone tell me what those letters meant, I had an epiphany about them.
Transvestites, Cross Dressers, Transexuals, Transgenders
Yikes
At this point everything became clear. The "guy" calling me darling, telling me to look at the profiles and the screen names like shoulder_hair_diva and askaboutmygroinscars all started to make sense. I immediately got terrified and left so fast there was an outline of my voluptuous form in the virtual wall of the chat room like I was Bugs Bunny. Although if I had stuck around maybe I would have met that one messed up Wachowski brother.
The thing that creeped me out most, besides the 220 pound men in mascara with their dicks taped to their taints, was that it was eerily similar to an experience I had in real life.
No! It's not what you're thinking! Shut up! Stop laughing! It was dark I couldn't see how big her hands were!
Can you tell I was desperate for something to write about today?
Now I have to change my name and move again.
Thank me for not putting pictures up with this one.
come together, right now (literally)
4 years ago
7 comments:
Well, at least the tranny was gentile about taking your Transgender Chatroom virginity.
Ryan sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name. They are always G.L.A.D you came. Taped taints aren't as scary as you might think young man! :)
I still haven't forgiven you for pretending to be that Ukrainian model. I really poured my heart out to you.
Does LOLA by The Kinks make more sense to you now?
hah! at the comments and hah! at
>>Now I have to change my name and move again.<<
That's weird... I usually have to tape mine onto my back.
Be thankful that this was online and not a live event that you stumbled into. Though that might have made for an even better story...
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